Blocks

There is a reason why this blog is called The Perpetual Wantrepreneur.  Amongst many things, it's about the journey, a journey, in this case, my journey toward entrepreneurship.  This has been an evolutionary process, longer than I care to speak about (I believe I mentioned a 30 year journey early on; it hasn't been quite that long, but long enough).  Entrepreneurship, as well as many other things in my life, has gone unfinished.  I am the classic brilliant artist, my work incomplete, for others to discover after my time has passed (just allow for some license here, and pretend that I actually AM a brilliant artist).  But we ARE artists, right?  All of us. I'll spare the excessive cliche here, but honestly, what's your canvas?  I've selected the dream of self-employment as mine, for the sake of this blog, hoping that some divine inspiration may come of it all, in the process lending some inspiration to others.  I have other dreams, too.  Not just entrepreneurship.  Even if it seems like an eternity to realize these dreams at times.  I've had my moments of glory in expressing this in my 18 posts, but it's still really early in the game.  And I like to believe that the same can be said about my journey toward entrepreneurship.  But it's simply not true, to be honest..

I had a friend tell me recently that there must be some kind of block in regard to my pursuit.  In all of my years of thinking about this, she was right.  It has to be a block.  I would like to explore this much more deeply, to get to the root cause.  I'm a troubleshooter by trade; why can't I figure this out on my own?  How can I explain such a grand delay?  Jesus, I've started and finished so many things that I can't stand doing so much more efficiently than this pursuit.  This is supposed to be my dream, my legacy, my livelihood!  Yet here I am, blogging about my dreams and not making them my reality.  Aside from my own block, how much longer will you hang on, as I drag you through this agony?  Surely you must see some of the pain in this; and maybe that's why you tune in (or will eventually tune out).  Either way, I'm ok with the outcome.  I have no expectations here.  If you are honest with yourself, you are sure to find a block in your life, something that inhibits your progress to attaining your dreams.  Do you dream?  What does a dream life look like to you?  What direction is this dream headed, if you have even had the courage to have one, and who are you sharing it with?  Dreaming is easy.  Chasing a dream is another matter entirely.  I've shared a bunch of them with you.  Have a frank conversation with yourself, and think about what you can really do differently tomorrow to take that first step in your thousand mile journey.  Many times over the course of this journey, my first instinct was to run:  I'm in the wrong place.  I can't make it happen here.  Pursue my dreams here?  I hate it here!  Guess what..I'm going to preach presence again.  Because it works.  Remember where you are, right here, right now.  I'm pretty far removed from what I'm accustomed to (simply put, I'm in a sparsely populated area).  There is a lot of farmland.  And a lot of natural beauty.  No matter what the outcome of my life, I am staying put today, staying present.  No more running for me (although it is a constant temptation).  I'll never get anywhere unless I don't go anywhere.  And you may be at mile marker 999, and you don't even know it.